Sunday, September 9, 2007

Chuck Norris.....

For my laptop and Desktop at work I use a version of Linux called Ubuntu, and they are paying homage to an intergalactic legend this week. I thought I would share the love.

Everybody needs to post their favorite Chuck Norris jokes.... Here are some of ours (feel free to post your own favorites....):
  • When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the earth down.
  • Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
  • There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
  • Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
  • The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
  • There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
  • Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
  • The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
  • Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
  • Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
  • Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

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